Everybody Has Something To Hide Except Me And My Monkey

By Jake Corbin

“There’re only two kinds of people in the world: Beatles people and Elvis people. Now Beatles people can like Elvis and Elvis people can like the Beatles, but nobody likes them both equally. Somewhere, you have to make a choice.” – Uma Thurman as Mia Wallace in “Pulp Fiction”

The time to make a choice for Vatican newspaper, L'Osservatore Romano, came Saturday. Its decision: the lads from Liverpool.

The paper—which focuses more on the doings of the Pope than the realm of popular entertainment—ran an article celebrating the 40th anniversary of the Beatles “White Album,” saying the LP is a testament to how creative the group was compared to the “standardized, stereotypical” songs being produced today.

Such high praise coming from a pro-Vatican publication came as a shock to some. Although the Beatles have amassed a large fan base over the years, the Catholic Church, traditionally, has not been a huge fan of the Brit-rockers.

In 1966, during the peak of Beatlemania, the group’s guitarist/vocalist, John Lennon, upset religious goers the world over after declaring the foursome were “more popular than Jesus.”

Needless to say, the church, and many of its followers, did not agree.

L’Osservatore Romano, however, dismissed the remark as nothing more than a youthful joke, saying it was a case of “showing off” and a result of enjoying “unexpected success.”

The newspaper went on to discuss the Fab Four’s “unique and strange alchemy of sounds and words” and referred to the “White Album” as a “magical musical anthology.”

Apparently, time does heal all wounds.

Or, perhaps, the music is simply too good to stay mad forever.

The “White Album” has long been a favorite of fans and critics alike; Rolling Stone rated it the tenth greatest album of all time, calling it “an exhilarating sprawl—some of the Beatles’ most daring and delicate work.” Not surprisingly, the Recording Industry Association of America reports the record is one of the seven highest certified albums of all time.

The masterpiece is so popular in fact that it made a leap most albums cannot—the musical genre jump from rock to hip-hop.

In 2004, Brian “Dangermouse” Burton, using a cappella versions of Jay Z’s “Black Album” combined with beats constructed from the Beatles’ famous record, created the “Grey Album.”

The "mash up" became an Internet sensation (and spawned a cease-and-desist letter from EMI), not only helping the producer/DJ kick-start a career in the music industry but also giving Beatles fans something new to chew on.

Let’s see the “Elvis people” put together a project like that.


p.s. If you don’t understand the title of my column, stop what you’re doing and go listen to the “White Album.”

Beats, Breaks and Bytes

By Jake Corbin

Technology and hip-hop have always been intertwined; from microphones to massive 16-track recorders, machines have played an integral part in the art form.

And just like technology, the art is changing.

Over the past few years, many in the DJ community have broke with tradition and abandoned their analog format for a digital one. Instead of two turntables, vinyl and a mixer, disc jockeys are hooking up to laptops and external hard drives to “spin” mp3s.

The introduction of Serato’s Scratch LIVE hardware and software—which allows DJs to manipulate digital audio on their laptop with special vinyl records on their turntables—is a major reason for the revolution.

Here’s how Serato works: A USB interface syncs the turntables and mixer with the laptop (and the Scratch LIVE program). A unique control signal is given off from Scratch LIVE that allows it to track the motion of the records on the turntables, simulating the same movement with digital audio on the laptop.

Essentially, same record feel but none of the problems that come with it. Gone are the days of ruining records from continuous use (and abuse). No more flipping sides and switching out records, either—everything is done on the same two slabs of Serato vinyl.

More importantly, however, the days of hauling multiple crates of records to gigs have been abolished as well; something touring DJs—and their wallets—will love.

“It basically saved my life, because I got hit with about $3, 200 of extra bag charges from carrying records [on airplanes],” DJ Jazzy Jeff said in an interview on the Scratch LIVE website. “This, to me, saved two turntables and a mixer for the future.”

Jazzy Jeff, one of the first to publicly embrace Serato, added with a smile: “It doesn’t make DJing any easier, but it does make carrying records easier.”

Scratch LIVE also includes a plethora of process effects, including looping capabilities, allowing several creative vantage points the time-tested, analog DJ set-up simply doesn’t offer.

“Artistically it was exactly what I was looking for. Just raw power,” TradeMark310 wrote while weighing in on the Serato program on DJ Z-Trip’s website. “Any sound was now available to me to scratch and spin and manipulate.

“Hip-hop was based on making noise with whatever you could get your hands on. Huge speakers, funky breaks, spray paint cans, linoleum, whatever. Serato is just like a new tool, a new way to express yourself.”

Despite its creative (and convenient) advantages, not everyone is ready to usher in the era of digital DJing.

DJ P, real name Danny Phillips, is first on the list.

Phillips, who first gained notoriety after he and DJ Z-Trip put out “Uneasy Listening,” a non-stop blend of ‘80s and hip-hop music using only vinyl and turntables, is upset by the shortcuts Serato allows.

“I think Serato has completely ruined the art form; it has killed the culture of DJing,” Phillips said bluntly. “It has become too easy for someone to put together a mix on their computer and go to a club and play that mix.”

Although Serato has made it easier for DJs who tour and haul records through busy airports, it has also diminished the painstaking art of searching out new records.

“Back in the day, you had to dig for records—that’s what made a DJ,” Phillips said with exasperation. “[Serato] made it so anyone who can download a file will have that record.”

In essence, the mystery of the DJ’s record collection has been spoiled by the advent of technology; digging through dusty crates in the local record store for an elusive album has been replaced by a few clicks of the mouse and time spent on peer-to-peer file sharing sites.

“DJing has always been about someone who spins vinyl,” Phillips said. “Doing it live with vinyl is hard. It’s like playing an instrument—it is an instrument—if you miss a cue to mix in the next record you have to improvise and find a way out of trouble.”

Vinyl or binary code, one thing is for sure: DJing is here to stay. As technology progresses and a new generation of kids step behind the decks (or whatever machine is used to play music), we can at least hope the art of party rocking stays intact.

Good thing DJ P will be around to remind anyone who forgets.



[Photo courtesy of Helppo on Flickr]

Rage Against the Machine

Or, why I’ve come to hate online ticketing services


By Jake Corbin

When it comes to the weekend, I don’t get out of bed until I’m good and ready. Alarm clocks do not exist on Saturday and Sunday in my world.

After five days of pushing papers at work, expanding my brain at school and burning the midnight oil doing homework, my batteries need to recharge.

All that changes, however, when concert tickets are on the line.

I woke up at exactly 10 a.m. today to purchase two tickets to see NOFX (one of my all-time favorite punk bands!) at the Fillmore in San Francisco.

Since I don’t live in the Bay area, the only way to buy them was through the venue’s website. Using my stellar Internet skills, it took only a few clicks before I was ready to secure my tickets.

Two general admission tickets (yeah! I don’t have to worry about getting a bad seat) for NOFX at the Fillmore, Friday, February 13, 2009. So far, so good.

Price: $22.50 per ticket. Not bad, especially considering this band has been rocking for 25 years now!

Convenience fee: $8.50 per ticket. Wait! Huh? Hold on a minute.

Order fee: $5. Seriously? What the hell is going on here?!

When it was all said and done, I paid nearly $70 for tickets that, at face value, are worth only $45. That’s like buying three tickets and only receiving two.



Concert promoters Ticketmaster and Live Nation have made it virtually impossible to buy tickets online or via phone for events without incurring added fees on top of ticket prices.

With a stranglehold over most major venues throughout the country, the ticketing business giants have forced consumers into a corner: Either you pay the additional fees or don’t see the show.

But what are these so-called “convenience” fees even for?

A search of Live Nation’s eight pages of frequently asked questions turned up nothing about the mystery fees—how convenient.

Ticketmaster, however, offered this:

“This fee [convenience charge] covers costs that allow Ticketmaster to provide the widest range of available tickets while giving you multiple ways to purchase… the convenience charge varies by event and is determined by negotiations with arena operators, promoters and others, based on costs for each event.”

Question: What is Ticketmaster (and Live Nation for that matter) doing that other websites are not? There aren’t convenience fees, for example, when you buy a book from Amazon.com. Isn’t this the same thing? You log on, click “buy”, put your credit card information in and wait for a confirmation. What makes these concert promoters so special?

As for the additional processing fee, Ticketmaster says:

“The order processing fee covers the cost to fulfill your ticket request when you purchase the tickets online or by phone. This charge includes services, such as taking and maintaining your order on our ticketing systems, arranging for shipping and/or coordinating with the box office will call.”

Once again, what extra service are they providing? Processing fees don’t apply when ordering DVDs from BestBuy.com. Why is the piece of paper the ticket is printed on any different?

Something just doesn’t seem to add up.

Steve Butcher, CEO of Brown Paper Tickets, a Seattle-based ticketing service, says his competitor’s reasoning for extra service fees—technology costs being a prime example—simply doesn’t make sense.

“With technology, the cost of delivering the same services over the years has gone way down but the fees have gone up,” Butcher told Marketplace radio.

Butcher said his company uses similar anti-fraud technology as Ticketmaster, but on a $10 ticket, Brown Paper charges a significantly smaller service fee: only $1.24.

Butcher has managed to keep costs down by avoiding long-term contracts with venues and never negotiating service fees.

“One of the first things [venues would] ask before they signed up was ‘how much of the service fee can we get back?’” Butcher said. “We said, ‘Well, actually, no, you just increase your price [of the ticket] to get what you need and we keep our service fee.’”

IS THERE A SOLUTION?

Face it, until big promoters like Ticketmaster and Live Nation switch their business model to Brown Paper Tickets’ approach, additional fees are something consumers will have to continue to combat.

There is, however, one solution for cash-strapped concert-goers: Attend local shows only.

By going to shows in your town, you can buy tickets directly from the venue box office and avoid the costly convenience of the Internet.

Now if only NOFX would add a Sacramento date.

[Crowd photo courtesy of spinal_faun on Flickr]
["Rip Off" photo courtesy of outerworldarcade.com]